#02751
On The Internet (Bernie Sheaves) video
#1277: YouTube video by oldirishladdie
©2009 ~ Used with permission ~

Have you heard about the strange
goings on in Newfoundland?
A-shopping at Sears you can order up a man;
And when he arrives they say he's well equipped,
Thanks to the computer and the Internet.

My wife came home from her cards the other night,
Walkin' in the room, her face was snow white;
You won't believe who up and quit,
Theresa's found a man on the Internet.

On the Internet you can get 'em all,
Fat ones, skinny ones, you can even order bald;
Young ones, old ones, they come in black and white,
On the Internet you can order what you like.

Down in Bonne Bay there's something gone wrong,
Beth stopped cooking for her husband John;
He said I don't know, I can't prove it yet,
I bet she's found a man on the Internet.

I went to the Legion last Saturday night,
I saw a strange man, he was far from white;
Then when he spoke, I nearly flipped,
He said your sister found me on the Internet.

On the Internet you can get 'em all,
Fat ones, skinny ones, you can even order bald;
Young ones, old ones, they come in black and white,
On the Internet you can order what you like.

Uncle Bobby said things are not the same,
Since the computer our home is not the same;
Instead of doing housework all she does is sit,
Drinkin' her coffee, surfin' the Internet.

Now don't get me wrong, men are doing the same,
But John down in Bonne Bay who had a lotta strain,
Bought himself a computer, and you can bet,
He's talkin' to women on the Internet.

On the Internet you can get it all,
Fat ones, skinny ones, you can even order bald;
Young ones, old ones, they come in black and white,
On the Internet you can order what you like.
On the Internet you can order what you like.

####.... Bernie Sheaves of Port aux Basques, NL ....####
The video above features a recording by Bernie Sheaves (If The Need Should Come, trk#1, 2006, SWC Productions, English Harbour West, NL - To purchase an album, contact Bernie-Marina Sheaves on facebook).

See more songs by Bernie Sheaves.


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