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Me mother used to smoke, well she laughed and drank and joked,
Well, she might've reached a hundred but was ninety when she died;
But me father did his best, exercised and all the rest,
Took trouble with his water, reached forty and expired!
So I'm leavin' all that heavin', all that liftin' and all that wheezin',
All that pushin' and that squeeezin' ain't no way to live your life!
Take the lumps and bumps, my Paddy, let your belly turn to jelly.
Why live a life of misery trying to add some time to life?
Cousin Ralphie had his health, he had intelligence and wealth,
He should've got to ninety but was snuffed at ninety one,
Jogging backwards down the road with the Stones in his 'phones,
Enraptured by the harmony from a dump truck B flat horn.
So I'm leavin' all that heavin', all that liftin' and all that wheezin',
All that pushin' and that squeeezin' ain't no way to live your life!
Take the lumps and bumps, my Paddy, let your belly turn to jelly.
Why live a life of misery trying to add some time to life?
My sister stays in shape doin' squats and liftin' weights,
She can lift three hundred fifty pounds and weighs almost as much!
She eats just like a horse, and works as much of course,
Mostly flexin' muscles in her jaws and cheeks and guts!
So I'm leavin' all that heavin', all that liftin' and all that wheezin',
All that pushin' and that squeeezin' ain't no way to live your life!
Take the lumps and bumps, my Paddy, let your belly turn to jelly.
Why live a life of misery trying to add some time to life?
