#01702
Eli's Arctic Cat (Ellis and Wince Coles) tabs

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Uncle Eli, all shakin', called out,
"Sophie, look at this:
It's a brand new Arctic Cat,
I think you'll be impressed;
Now I know how much you hates 'em,
Many times I've heard you say,
But the salesman let me have 'er,
Said to try her for a day."

He said, "Darlin', here's a helmet,
Let's ride off into the wild,
And before the day is over,
On your face you'll wear a smile."
She said, "Eli take it easy!"
As she placed it on her head,
And her nerves called out for Prozac,
Drivin' down the railroad bed.

They were soakin' up the beauty,
The sweet scent of the pine,
When a bunch of snowmobilers,
They just drove up from behind;
"We sure love the Cat you're ridin',
But the driver's old and slow."
With that, Eli pulled the throttle,
Left them in a cloud of snow.

He said, "I'll show them young marvels
Uncle Eli ain't no wimp!"
As faster than a laser beam
Across the bog he went;
Like a supercharged tornado,
He broke out on Square Pond,
Where he thought about Aunt Sophie,
Turned and looked: "My gosh, she's gone!"

He said, "Lord, all this happen'd
'cause me ego was too big,"
As he drove up on her false teeth,
Next a round button, then her wig;
Through the spruce he seen her rubbers,
But right then he did not know,
That her feet was still inside 'em,
She was head first in the snow.

Well, he pulled her out and kissed her,
"You don't love me now I knows,"
Said "I'll go and light a fire,
'cause your pretty face is froze."
As he gathered up some kindling,
She taped his throttle open wide,
To herself said, "That old hobo'll
Soon be takin' his last ride."

By the cozy flamin' fire, Sophie said,
"Do you know what?
Of all your photos in my album,
Neither sexy one I've got;
I'd love to have one on me bureau
'bout fourteen inches square,
With you settin' on that Arctic Cat
In just your underwear."

He said, "Sophie, you old darlin',
All me life and now I know,
That you been fantasizin'
About me on a centerfold."
He dropped his pants and flexed his muscles,
Sayin', "Sophie look at that."
And in his polka-dotted boxer shorts,
Jumped on the Arctic Cat.

She said, "Eli, start the motor,
Make this picture come alive!"
He not knowin' then that Sophie
Had tied his throttle open wide;
Now we all can see the picture:
Eli quite not fully dressed,
Disappearin' in the sunset
Like a bullet goin' west.

On the railroad bed in Badger,
Where his gas tank it ran dry,
Eli set there like a statue,
All the folks just wondered why;
Soon the neighbors was all shoutin',
"Boys, emergency we got,
The man is settin' in his underwear,
Froze harder then a rock."

Oh, the goodness of them people,
Shared the warmthness of their home,
Where they defrost'd Uncle Eli,
And he soon was on the phone:
"Sophie, call up that old salesman,
Tell him that the Cat ain't safe;
And don't worry about your picture,
Another time another place.
And don't worry about your picture,
Another time another place."

####.... Ellis Coles ....####
Recorded by Ellis and Wince Coles (Harp And Hood, trk#3, 1999, SWC Productions, English Harbour West, NL).

See more songs by Ellis & Wince Coles.

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Notes On Tabs:
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All tabs have been contributed by visitors to this site and represent their interpretation of the tune. We are unable to verify their accuracy.
(Capo first fret)

Intro: [F] [C] [G] [C]
Uncle Eli all shakin', called out,
[F] "Sophie look at [C] this,
It's a brand new Arctic Cat,
I think you'll be im- [G] pressed;
Now, I [C] know how much you hates 'em,
Many [F] times I've heard you [C] say,
But the salesman let me have 'er,
Said to [G] try her for a [C] day."

He said, "Darlin', here's a helmet,
Let's ride [F] off into the [C] wild,
And before the day is over,
On your face you'll wear a [G] smile."
She said, [C] "Eli take it easy!"
As she [F] placed it on her [C] head,
And her nerves called out for Prozac,
Drivin' [G] down the railroad [C] bed.

They were soakin' up the beauty,
The [F] sweet scent of the [C] pine,
When a bunch of snowmobilers,
They just drove up from be- [G] hind,
"We sure [C] love the Cat you're ridin',
But the [F] driver's old and [C] slow,"
With that, Eli pulled the throttle,
Left them [G] in a cloud of [C] snow.

He said, "I'll show them young marvels,
Uncle [F] Eli ain't no [C] wimp!"
As faster then a laser beam,
Across the bog he [G] went;
Like a [C] supercharged tornado,
He [F] broke out on Square [C] Pond,
Where he thought about Aunt Sophie,
Turned and [G] looked,
"My gosh, she's [C] gone!"

Intro: [F] [C] [G] [C]
He said, "Lord, all this happen'd
'Cause me [F] ego was too [C] big."
As he drove up on her false teeth,
Next a round button, then her [G] wig;
Through the [C] spruce he seen her rubbers,
But right [F] then he did not [C] know,
That her feet was still inside 'em,
She was [G] head first in the [C] snow.

Well, he pulled her out and kissed her,
"You don't [F] love me now I [C] knows,"
Said, "I'll go and light a fire,
'Cause your pretty face is [G] froze."
As he [C] gathered up some kindling,
She taped his [F] throttle open [C] wide,
To herself said, "That old hobo'll
Soon be [G] takin' his last [C] ride."

By the cozy flamin' fire, Sophie [F] said,
"Do you know [C] what?
Of all your photos in my album
Neither sexy one I've [G] got;
I'd love to [C] have one on me bureau,
'Bout [F] fourteen inches [C] square,
With you settin' on that Arctic Cat
In [G] just your under- [C] wear."

He said, "Sophie, you old darlin',
All me [F] life and now I [C] know,
That you been fantasizin'
About me on a center- [G] fold."
He dropped his [C] pants and flexed his muscles,
Sayin', [F] "Sophie look at [C] that."
And in his polka-dotted boxer shorts,
Jumped [G] on the Arctic [C] Cat.

She said, "Eli, start the motor,
Make this [F] picture come a- [C] live!"
He not knowin' then that Sophie
Had tied his throttle open [G] wide;
Now, we [C] all can see the picture:
Eli [F] quite not fully [C] dressed,
Disappearin'' in the sunset
Like a [G] bullet goin' [C] west.

Intro: [F] [C] [G] [C]
On the railroad bed in Badger,
Where his [F] gas tank, it ran [C] dry,
Eli set there like a statue,
All the folks just wondered [G] why;
Soon the [C] neighbors was all shoutin',
"Boys, [F] emergency we [C] got,
The man is settin' in his underwear,
Froze [G] harder then a [C] rock."

Oh, the goodness of them people,
Shared the [F] warmthness of their [C] home,
Where they defrost'd uncle Eli,
And he soon was on the [G] phone:
"Sophie, [C] call up that old salesman,
Tell him [F] that the Cat ain't [C] safe,
And don't worry about your picture,
Another [G] time another [C] place.
And don't [F] worry about your [C] picture,
Another [G] time another [C] place."

~ Chords contributed by Bob Dumais ~


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