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How do, my friends? How are you all? I hope you're very ill,
For then I trust I'll sell to you just one little pill;
They're made of Rupert's butter, soap and cheese,
The more you take the less you'll want; I hope they will you please.
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, I'm a jolly old quack, quack, quack,
What carries his pack on his back;
I've plasters and pills and rollers and twill,
And they call me Medicine Jack.
My drafts they keep out drafts and colds out of your head,
Should be taken late at night before you go to bed;
And when you do prepare one dose just give it one big shake,
And in a glass of vodka one tablespoon you'll take.
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, I'm a jolly old quack quack quack,
What carries his pack on his back;
I've plasters and pills and rollers and twill,
And they call me Medicine Jack.
My plasters they are very good for pains in head an' hair,
For pains in arms, for pains in legs, for pains in everywhere;
You warm it at a fire and apply it very hard,
Very good, very cheap, only fourteen cents per yard.
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, I'm a jolly old quack quack quack,
What carries his pack on his back;
I've plasters and pills and rollers and twill,
And they call me Medicine Jack.
Do you want some teeth pulled out? If so I am the man,
I've crushers, squeezers, spades, and a pickaxe in my van;
I can pull you out a dozen teeth without the slightest pain,
And then as quick as lightning I can put them in again.
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, I'm a jolly old quack quack quack,
What carries his pack on his back;
I've plasters and pills and rollers and twill,
And they call me Medicine Jack.
You will not buy my medicine, for good I know not why,
You'd think poor Medicine Jack had told you one big lie;
But I have told the truth to you and on it I will swear,
And since you will not buy my goods I'll go and sell elsewhere.
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, is anyone ill? Is anyone ill?
Oh, my, I'm a jolly old quack quack quack,
What carries his pack on his back;
I've plasters and pills and rollers and twill,
And they call me Medicine Jack.
Sung by John A. McLellan (b.1869) of St. Georges, NL, and published in MacEdward Leach And The Songs Of Atlantic Canada © 2004 Memorial University of Newfoundland Folklore and Language Archive (MUNFLA).
