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I woke up this mornin' frozen nearly dead,
Was so damn cold I couldn't get out of bed;
As I lay there shiverin' as cold as can be,
Suddenly this revelation occurred to me.
I gotta find a woman with a chainsaw,
To spend the winter with me;
If I could find a woman with a chainsaw,
Than all night long I would stoke her fire, yes indeed.
I put an ad down at the Co-op, a notice on the stump,
I don't care if she's skinny, I don't care if she's plump;
I don't care if she's pretty or ugly as sin,
If she's got a chainsaw she can move right in.
I gotta find a woman with a chainsaw,
To spend the winter with me;
If I could find a woman with a chainsaw,
Than all night long I would stoke her fire, yes indeed.
Oh, you big city women in your Calvin Klein clothes,
Ain't much good when the ground gets froze;
I need a tough country mama, to help me chop my wood,
And when I find her, I'm gonna treat her good.
I gotta find a woman with a chainsaw,
To spend the winter with me;
If I could find a woman with a chainsaw,
Than all night long I would stoke her fire, yes indeed.
I'd treat her sweet and gentle, and we would never fight,
If she went out with someone else I wouldn't get uptight;
She can just do her thing, and I can do just mine,
And she and me and that machine we'd get along just fine.
I gotta find a woman with a chainsaw,
To spend the winter with me;
If I could find a woman with a chainsaw,
Than all night long I would stoke her fire, yes indeed.
I've got a cabin in the mountains, a Chevy pick-up truck,
With stereo and 4-wheel drive to pull us through the muck;
I've got a bushel of soy beans, a whole barrel of brown rice,
And a couple cords of firewood would make it all so very nice.
I gotta find a woman with a chainsaw,
To spend the winter with me;
If I could find a woman with a chainsaw,
Than all night long I would stoke her fire, yes indeed.
