Print This Page#01007 Print This Page
Two Irishmen and a Newfie once went out for recreation,
They carried enough provisions along to last a week's vacation;
But they got lost out in the woods, and the night was dark and lonely,
And all their provisions ran out except one piece of baloney.
Next morning, when they all awoke, quarter after seven,
One guy said, "I had a dream, and I dreamed I went to heaven;
I met St. Peter at the gate, and he was riding on a pony,
I don't think you can beat that dream, so give me the piece of baloney."
Now the other said, "I had a dream and it was a double feature,
I also died and went to heaven and was welcomed by St. Peter;
He looked at me, stuck out his hand, saying, 'Put 'er there, Maloney!'
I don't think you can beat that dream so give me the piece of baloney."
Now the Newfie said, "I must admit it's true that you were dreaming,
The reason why I know it's true, I was dreaming of you all evening;
I saw you two go up above and, gee, but I was lonely,
I thought that you would never get back, so I got up and ate the baloney."
Now I hope this'll be a lesson to you if you go out for recreation,
Make sure you take along enough grub to last a week's vacation;
The story that I told to you, I hope you don't think it's phony,
There's always one smart Newf around, and always a piece of baloney.
Yes, there's always one smart Newf around, and always a piece of baloney.
Now one guy said, "You must admit there's no use in waiting,
There's not enough provisions left to keep us all from starving;
I suggest we go to bed." "No!" said Maloney,
"Whoever has the nicest dream can eat the piece of baloney."
