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On the 29th of August in nineteen-ninety-eight,
There was a beautiful wedding, and it was time to celebrate;
Relatives and friends were there on the special day,
It was holy matrimony in the old, traditional way.
The church bells were ringing and the horns began to blow,
Reception was awaiting just a little down the road;
The bride and groom they said I do as a limo waited there,
The people cheered as the guns were fired in the air.
The savage cop in Savage Cove was Constable McGraw,
Waiting in his cruiser for someone to break the law;
He was like a Barney Fife and he couldn't understand,
Why he couldn't find a criminal down in Newfoundland.
He heard the guns a-firing as he woke up from his sleep,
He was so excited that he lifted off his seat;
The siren was a-blaring 'cause he thought it was a crime,
When he found it was a wedding, he completely lost his mind.
He grabbed the men who fired the guns and threw them in the car,
And told the bridal party, you're not gonna get too far;
He arrested all the children for loitering about,
Then he stopped the father-in-law and smashed his window out.
He arrested all the dogs and cats and threw them in the pound,
He threw them in together, and they were heard in Marystown;
The bride and groom were next to have the cuffs put on their wrists,
He threw them in with Grandpa who was ninety-six.
The savage cop in Savage Cove, he was out of control,
Breaking up a wedding and running them off the road;
All the folks around were caught completely by surprise,
A savage cop was on the loose and he wasn't civilized.
The mounties didn't tolerate the savage cop around,
Like Barney on the Griffith Show, he thought he owned the town;
Now he drives a snowmobile in twenty feet of snow,
Somewhere in the Arctic where the nights are long and cold.
Oh, the savage cop in Savage Cove, he was out of control.
See more songs by A. Frank Willis.
Bernard "Barney" P. Fife is a fictional dramatic character in the American television program The Andy Griffith Show, portrayed by comic actor Don Knotts [1924-2006]. Barney Fife is a deputy sheriff in the slow, sleepy southern community of Mayberry, North Carolina. He appeared in the first five black and white seasons (1960-1965) as a main character and, after leaving the show at the end of season five, made a few guest appearances in the following three color seasons (1965-1968). He appeared in a spin-off Mayberry R.F.D. (1968-1971) and in the 1986 reunion telemovie Return to Mayberry. Calling a police officer or authority figure "Barney Fife" has become an American slang term for gross ineptitude or overzealousness.