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Glory, halleluia, don't that put the screws right to ya?
The government and the wife drove me insane;
The wife wanted a patio so the old outhouse it had to go,
'Cause the government likes to keep all crap contained.
So, I commenced to the excavation,
Blew my garden to damnation,
Put a crater - where my veggies grew;
No more turnips and potatoes,
Goodbye scarecrows and picnic tables,
Goodbye plastic pink flamingos, too.
And then a leeching field was added,
Folks around said I was mad,
For digging up all my fertile land;
So then I took a building fit,
With the patio lights and the barbecue pit,
To please my wife, who's got the upper hand....
Glory, halleluia, don't that put the screws right to ya?
The government and the wife drove me insane;
The wife wanted a patio so the old outhouse it had to go,
'Cause the government likes to keep all crap contained.
And then I added a brand new crapper,
Drains and plugs and things that matter,
Purpulating water through the vines;
A lot of curse and smell and racket,
A mortgage in the high class bracket,
Meaning I'll be poor for quite some time.
So, here I sit by my barbecue,
Wondering what the hell I'm doing,
We've moved up in society, of course;
But, I can't help but think we've strayed,
It's more primitive in ways,
We cook outside, but now we crap indoors....
Glory, halleluia, don't that put the screws right to ya?
The government and the wife drove me insane;
The wife wanted a patio so the old outhouse it had to go,
'Cause the government likes to keep all crap contained.
