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Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
The first to come in was the minister's daughter,
She went in to pass some superfluous water;
She pulled on the chain and the rising tide caught her,
And nobody knew she was there.
Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
The next to come in was dear Mrs. Mason,
The stalls were all full so she peed in the basin;
And that is the water that I washed my face in,
And nobody knew she was there.
Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
The third old lady was Amelia Garpickle,
Her urge was sincere, her reaction was fickle;
She hurdled the door, she'd forgotten her nickel,
And nobody knew she was there.
Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
The fourth to come was old Mrs. Humphrey,
She shifted and jiggled to get herself comfy;
Then to her dismay, she could not get her bum free,
And nobody knew she was there.
Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
The fifth to come in, it was old Mrs. Draper,
She sat herself down and then found there was no paper;
She had to clean up with a plasterer's scraper,
And nobody knew she was there.
Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
The sixth old lady was Emily Clancy,
She went there 'cause something tickled her fancy;
But when she got there it was ants in her pantsy,
And nobody knew she was there.
Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
The seventh old lady was Elizabeth Bender,
She went there to repair a broken suspender;
It snapped up and ruined her feminine gender,
And nobody knew she was there.
Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
The janitor came in the early morning,
He opened the door without any warning;
The seven old ladies their seats were adorning,
And nobody knew they were there.
Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
Nobody knew they were there.
This variant recorded by Oscar Brand of Winnipeg, Manitoba [Canadian naturalized U.S. citizen b.1920] (Bawdy Songs And Backroom Ballads — Vol. III, trk#A.01, 1950, Audio Fidelity, NY).
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Notes On Guitar Tabs:
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All guitar tabs have been contributed by visitors to this site and represent their interpretation of the tune. We are unable to verify their accuracy.
[D] Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
[A] Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
[D] They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
[A] Nobody knew they were [D] there.
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Alternate Tabs:
[G] Oh, dear, what can the matter be?
[D] Seven old ladies got locked in the lavat'ry;
[G] They were there from Sunday till Saturday,
[D7] Nobody knew they were [G] there.
