The CN Bus

It was a cold winter's night and not a star was in sight,
As we rolled down the hill to Random West,
On the CNR bus that had caused quite a fuss,
For replacing our Newfoundland Express.

Now in a seat in the rear sat a man who was here,
To see how long t'would take to make the dash;
Old MacMillian they said a promotion would get,
If his buses could save the railway cash.

In a seat just ahead sat a lady in red,
Maggy Hawkins from Upper Gullies Trap;
She weighed 23 stone and the bus gave a groan,
As she got up and started for the back.

It was Maggie's intent as the floor boards she bent,
To enter the powder room in back;
It was a small two-by-four with a hatch for a door,
Situated beneath the luggage rack.

Now all the crowd gave a roar as she opened the door,
And old Maggie to force herself she tried;
But alas she got stuck like a Lundrigan truck,
It was plain she would never get inside.

She went back to her seat dripping sweat in the heat,
Saying, ooh how I miss the good old train;
And if this thing doesn't park until well after dark,
My poor kidneys will never stand the strain.

Said a man turning pale, she's been drinking peg ale,
Give her first aid - this surely is a crime;
That's when MacMillian did jump up in the aisle and did shout,
Keep her rollin', we're making record time!

For an hour they drove until outside Arnolds Cove,
Old Mag got up and started for the door;
And his stop watch in his hand Gordy MacMillian took his stand,
Told the driver to put her to the floor.

Now with a final lashing, Maggie sucked in her cheeks,
And a brave burst of fire and of steam,
And a thunderous roar that shook the valley and the shore,
And the bus blew apart beside a stream.

There were 20 men maimed as the rescue squad came,
Not a trace of Maggie could be seen;
Old MacMillian went blind, one poor man blew his mind,
And the driver woke up in Lamalene.

Well, on the crest of a hill just outside of Clarenville,
Stands a tombstone to mark Mag's last remains;
May her soul ever fly to that great bathroom in the sky,
For she's the lady that gave us back our TRAAAAAIIIIINNNN.

####.... Tom Cahill. Popularized by Joan Morrissey (1933-1978) (Joan Morrissey - Recorded Live At The Admiral's Keg, 1969) ....####

See more songs by Joan Morrissey.

CNR - Canadian National Railway