Let the music load
A Texas cowboy walked into a drug
store and asked to talk to a male pharmacist. The woman he was talking to said that she was the pharmacist and as she and her sister owned the store, there
were no males employed there. She then asked if she could help the Gentleman.
The cowpoke said that it was something that he would be much more comfortable discussing with a male pharmacist.
The female pharmacist assured him that she was completely professional and whatever it was that he needed to discuss, he could be confident
that she would treat him with the highest level of professionalism.
The old bronco-buster agreed and began by saying, "This
is tough for me to discuss, but I have a permanent erection. It causes me a lot of problems and severe embarrassment, and I was wondering what you could give me for it.
The pharmacist said, "Just a minute, I'll go talk to my sister." When she returned, she said, "We discussed it at
length and the absolute best we can do is, 1/3 ownership in the store, a company car, and
$3,000 a month plus living expenses."
----------------------------------
Two nicely dressed women happened to start up a conversation while
waiting for their flights from the LAX Airport. The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man. The second was a well-mannered, elderly woman from the South. When the conversation got around to children, the California woman started by saying, "When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me." The lady from the South commented "Well, isn't that precious?" The first woman continued, "When my second child was born, my husband bought me a beautiful Mercedes-Benz." Again, the lady from the South commented, "Well, isn't that precious?" The first woman continued boasting, "Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet." Yet again, the Southern lady commented, "Well, isn't that precious? The first woman then asked her companion, "What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?"
My husband sent me to charm school," declared the old Southern lady.
"Charm school?" the first woman cried, "Oh my God! What on earth for?
The Southern lady responded, "Well for one thing, instead of saying, Who gives a shit? I learned to say, Well, isn't that precious?
---------------------------------------
A little Indian boy asked his father, the big chief and witch doctor of the tribe, "Papa, why is it that we always have long names, while the white men have shorter names - Bill, Tex or Sam, for example?" His father replied, "Look, son, our names represent a symbol, a sign, or a poem for our culture not like the white men, who live all together and repeat their names from generation to generation. Also, it is part of our makeup that in spite of everything, we survive. For example, your sister's name is Small Romantic Moon Over The Lake, because on the night she was born, there was a beautiful moon reflected in the lake. Then there's your brother, Big White Horse of the Prairies, because he was born on a day that the big white horse who gallops over the prairies of the world appeared near our camp and is a symbol of our capacity to live and the life force of our people. It's very simple and easy to understand. Do you have any other questions, Little Broken Condom Made in China
WELCOME TO TPA
(Terrorist-Proof Airlines)
We at TPA, Terrorist-Proof Airline, are in the flying business where we can absolutely guarantee no WALK-ON GUNS, KNIVES, BOX CUTTERS, SHOE-BOMBS or other weapons will ever be carried onto OUR FLIGHTS!
Book your next flight with TPA, the safest airline in the industry.
NEXT PAGE
HOME
All pages for funny stuff
INDEX
|
|