A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our
brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill"
A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw up."
"Now," said the teacher, "can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the steer on the altar?"
Without a moment's hesitation a little dark haired spoke out with great assurance: "I know, I know," she said..... "the water was needed to make the gravy!"
The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Johnny interrupted "Shucks, that's nothin' teacher, my mommy looked back once while she was driving " he announced triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"
A Sunday school teacher asked, "Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?"
"No," replied Johnny. "After all how much fishin' could a man do with just two worms?"
A Sunday school teacher said to her children, "We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But there is a higher power, can anybody tell me what it is?"
One child immediately blurted out--- That's an easy one Miss Davis........ "Aces!"
Nine-year-old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday School. "Well Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to the Red Sea he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. Then he used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcement bombers to blow up the bridge, and all the Israelites were saved."
"Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his mother asked "Well, no, Mom. But, if I told it the way the teacher did you'd never believe it!"
A Sunday School teacher decided to have her young class memorize one of the most quoted passages in the Bible, Psalm 23. She gave the youngsters a month to learn the verse. Little Bobby was excited about the task. But, he just couldn't remember the Psalm. After much practice, he could barely get past the first line. On the day the kids were scheduled to recite Psalm 23 for their parents and the whole congregation Bobby was very nervous. When it was his turn he sat there for a moment in silence as if in deep thought. Then he smiled and spoke up proudly... "The Lord is my shepherd and that's all I need to know.
Page by Mary Jones
March--2006
If you'd like to join my mailing list for future pages email me with the word SUBSCRIBE in the subject line and I'll sign you up immediately. However a word of caution is in order. I make my pages with WEB TV instead of a computer and we do not have the bcc feature. (blind carbon copy). That means that there will be other names on the pages I send out, I put 50 names per mailing. So if that is of concern to you then you probably won't want to sign up for my mailing list. Also my pages are quite varied though the majority of them are either patriotic or inspirational in nature. I also make web pages about things I feel the America people should know but many don't , and these pages could be considered controverial by some So although I would love to have you join my mailing list I think you should know the kinds of pages I make because with a mailing list of over 8,000 it's very hard to ffind the names of people who ask to UNSUBSCRIBE, I will do it but it is very hard and time consuming. SO PLEASE CONSIDER THESE THINGS BEFORE YOU ASK TO BE ON MY MAILING LIST. --MARY
