In my attempts to make the universe a better place to help one and all, not only do I have doctoring, laboratory, and scullery skills but I'm somewhat of an inventor, of sorts. Here are some of the ingenious ideas I'm gonna get patents for... maybe, *fingers crossed* I hope... as long as I can get to the Patent Office before those pesky Haz-Mat and OSHA dudes figure out what I'm doing.


I got the idea for the Cloning Machine because I don't always have time to be puttering around in my scullery. There are so many wonderful web sites to visit that baking my WORLD FAMOUS Asparagus & Radish Cookies was being put on a back burner and this just wouldn't do... then I got to thinking about how I would get the cookies to everyone pell mell, real fast as in ASAP... maybe a, no, that wouldn't work... hmmmmmmm *eyes widen* I GOT IT! a Cookie Launcher! Brilliant... sometimes I amaze me.

     

The principle behind my Cookie Launcher is so simple, I don't know why I didn't think of it eons ago. After my WORLD FAMOUS Asparagus & Radish Cookies exit the Cookie Cloning machine, they head for the Cookie Launcher and I fire them off to where-ever they are needed... don't worry, they won't break or anything cause I only use the very best ingredients, like the flour from "Harden Fast Redi-Mix Concrete Co" *it's special order*... go ahead, try it out *sets dial for SciFi Suzi's web site*


It really works


And what to do when all those web sites are beckoning to you but the house needs to be tidied up... such a chore to drag out the bulldozer and push all the dust and stuff into the big hole over in the corner. That's where my new "Robotic Laser Cleaner" and handy dandy "Magic Foot Mopper" will cut the cleaning time in half.

          


And I like pets, just ask Shadow the Kitty. Pets are great companions and provide hours of fun for young and old alike. Lots of people treat them almost human and this got me to thinking about maybe pets have egos or something, especially tiny pets.


Fish Ego Boosting Mirror


This is one of my best inventions yet... it's called "Flit's Accelerated Time Machine"... you just set the dial thing for the longitude and latitude, then set the time and date on another dial thing... put on the harness so you don't accidently fall out of the seat... cross your fingers... then pull the lever


warning:
professional driver
don't try this at home


My campaign for Ruler of the Universe is going great ... I've been hard at work spreading the word to everyone that if I'm elected, there will be a chicken  ummmmm a porkloin    some kind of meat thing in every cauldron and FREE ISP for everyone there, but how to spread the word of my campaign WORLD WIDE? By jove, I think I got it!

                  


This is my office where I have all my important inventing type paper work... you can enjoy a few of my WORLD FAMOUS Asparagus & Radish Cookies and after I finish getting all my important diagrams together, I can walk you to the escape route door.



I'm gonna hitch up Brucie the Burro and go to the Patent Office cause for some reason I haven't heard anything from them lately... must be a problem with the mail or something, this is a somewhat remote place so maybe the carrier pigeon got lost. And please, take one of my campaign buttons with you and help with my election.




     

Could have sworn there were people working here when I arrived.